One night, when feeling poorly,
Upright I would have to sit,
If I were to get any rest,
And avoid feeling more unfit.
I was beyond all thought...
Too exhausted to care,
When I sank down to doze
In that recliner chair.
Later, when I awoke
To do the 'Nature' thing,
As I sat apon the throne
I heard a metallic 'ting'.
I jumped up to reach the switch
By the bathroom door:
Lo, and behold! A shiny quarter
Was reposing on the floor.
Somehow, the coin had stuck
Quite firmly to my bum,
Until I reached the privy
To get my business done.
Two bowls of oatmeal, fighting
In my pantaloons, for space...
My private degradation:
My middle-aged disgrace.
Guess it is time to hit the trail
On my stationary bike,
In hopes of maybe regaining
A waistline that I like.
A.K.Garrigus
May 2005
©